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Taboo or not Taboo

One of the ideas I’ve had for this blog is The Taboo Bookclub. I envision that, every month or so, we’d pick a book for discussion that has a taboo in it. This idea, though, has proved easier to imagine than to implement. For starters, one person’s taboo is another’s who the hell cares. Additionally, there are so many types of taboos. There are character taboos–things like “I could never like a heroine who had an abortion.” There are context taboos–things like “I could never enjoy a book set in a religious cult.” There are taboos that involve both–“I refuse to read a book where the heroine has an abortion while living in a religious cult.” And there are taboos that that make my Twitter feed go crazy.

Furthermore we live–thank the gods–in a time where we respect each other’s limits. I might be fine with a book where the heroine cheats on the hero, but if you tell me you’re not, I’m not about to tell you you should be more open minded in your reading.

So, the Taboo Bookclub is still, at best, an idea in development.

But, were we to create one, I’m interested to know: What are your taboos in romance reading?

If you tell me yours, I’ll tell you mine.

Taboo #1: The insta-pregnancy. I spent a very miserable year trying desperately to get pregnant so I now hate stories where the couple, despite using a condom and practicing withdrawal, find themselves preggers. It’s not only unlikely, it sends a message that birth control is barely worth trying. For me, it’s an almost lock that I’ll hate the book.

Taboo #2: Renesmee Cullen Syndrome. If a lead (like Jacob in the Twilight books) first fell for his/her true love when she/he was a child, that’s flat out creepy. I don’t mind the, wow, she’s suddenly a woman now love story, but tales where the guy watched the girl flower into womanhood are a no-go for me.

Taboo #3: The hero/heroine has sacrificed everything for for their true love but she/he still doesn’t trust in their feelings. There’s a scene at the end of Susan Elizabeth Phillip’s This Heart of Mine where Kevin, the hero, has gone way beyond the call of true love to show Molly he truly loves her and she’s still not quite buying it. So, he sorta kinda drowns her so he can rescue her and thus prove he is worthy of her love. I hate this scene. I hate it more than the sperm stealing scene which is, I suspect, more taboo for many. Grand gestures are fine. Grand gestures on top of grand gestures especially when the former require sacrifice or exposure to danger on the part of the gesturer make me want to shut the book and watch Orphan Black.

Taboo #4: Gorgeous apartments/cosy homes lived in by those with no strong source of income (or why I never liked Sex in the City.) Heroes and heroines who dwell in safe, quiet, architecturally interesting places in high priced zip codes annoy the hell out of me. A room in a crappy house in Brooklyn goes for 1300 a month on Airbnb. The heroine who lives in Chelsea in an adorable room over a Vietnamese restaurant run by sweet sages who give her free food all the time makes me fume. It’s a slap in the face to all those working their tails off just to pay the rent in Newark.

OK, OK. So maybe these aren’t taboos as much as preferences. I think that’s because I don’t really have any taboos. A great writer can make me buy into almost anything. And the things that bother many–adultery, abortion, arrogance, abrogation of the law–don’t keep me from reading and even enjoying romance.

But that’s just me.

What about you?

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Lissa
Lissa
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03/24/2015 10:38 pm

Mine are preferences, not taboos. I hate love triangles, because they are just a long preparation for watching someone hurt and disappointed. In my experience rejecting anyone, even people you don’t find at all attractive, is unpleasant for both parties. I don’t need that misery in my pleasure reading. I actively dislike employer/employee romances, partially because of the power dynamic, but also because several of the few I’ve read include (sometimes explicitly) the message that sexual harassment rules are just silly. Hell no.
One dislike that might involve a taboo is the absence of truly dominant women. Male characters with alpha personalities are expected to be dominant everywhere. No one seems to expect a man who wants to lead at work to come home and want someone else to run his sex life. In romance, I have yet to see a woman who does not want to be led anywhere, who will only accept a partner or subordinate, not a supposed superior. Why should a woman’s dominant personality switch on and off, but not a man’s? Makes no sense. I’ve also seen a discouraging number of comments on blogs about how a female character might be a leader at work, but that’s tiring, so at the end of the day, she wants someone else to be dominant. Why isn’t it tiring for men?

willaful
willaful
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Reply to  Lissa
03/25/2015 12:58 pm

Excellent point. In real life, I think it *is* very tiring for men.

But most romance is written to please (what are assumed to be) women’s fantasies, and the assumption is pretty narrow. Submissive men in the media are almost invariably jokes. Though we are starting to get some good books now. Cara McKenna’s Unbound and Shelley Ann Clark’s Have Mercy are two I liked.

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
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Reply to  Lissa
03/25/2015 6:53 pm

Employer/employee relationships was one of my chosen dislikes as well. I especially do not enjoy them if the power dynamic is not adequately explored and in a careful and sensitive way.

Yuri
Yuri
Guest
03/23/2015 9:48 am

Blackjack1:
I find this to be especially true around issues of parenthood. If authors want to represent couples happy sans children, that plot is usually accompanied with lots of reasons or excuses. I personally would like to read a romance that features abortion because the pregnancy is unwanted, or even better, the overt use of birth control by couples that do not want children, because the equation of children with happiness in romantic relationships is problematic and far overdone. I’m ready to see alternative family arrangements in romance writing.

Good point. Even though romance has been good about showing positive relationships with stepchildren, adopted and foster kids, within romance not wanting children is still so unusual as to make one think at the very least its a marketing taboo.

I wouldn’t usually think that is a cultural taboo except that came up with a friend of mine and he looked very shocked and thought that there must be something wrong with someone (of either sex) who didn’t want kids – I was never sure if he meant morally or neurologically! I have heard people describe childless people as selfish which always bewilders me. And a friend of mine who doesn’t want kids got to the point that was almost the first question out of her mouth after introductions on a date – she eliminated an awful lot of potential partners that way as it was very rare for the man to say he didn’t want kids either. So maybe romance is reflecting the wider culture in this area – however weird it seems to me!

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
Guest
03/22/2015 10:59 am

Here’s a definition of taboo. It’s a pretty broad word.

noun
noun: taboo; plural noun: taboos; noun: tabu; plural noun: tabus

1.
a social or religious custom prohibiting or forbidding discussion of a particular practice or forbidding association with a particular person, place, or thing.
synonyms: prohibition, proscription, veto, interdiction, interdict, ban, restriction
“”the taboo against healing on the Sabbath””
a social practice that is prohibited or restricted.
“”speaking about sex is a taboo in his country””

adjective
adjective: taboo; adjective: tabu

1.
prohibited or restricted by social custom.
“”sex was a taboo subject””
synonyms: forbidden, prohibited, banned, proscribed, interdicted, outlawed, illegal, illicit, unlawful, restricted, off limits; More
unmentionable, unspeakable, unutterable, unsayable, ineffable;
rude, impolite
“”taboo subjects””
antonyms: acceptable
designated as sacred and prohibited.
“”the burial ground was seen as a taboo place””

verb
verb: taboo; 3rd person present: taboos; past tense: tabooed; past participle: tabooed; gerund or present participle: tabooing; verb: tabu; 3rd person present: tabus; past tense: tabued; past participle: tabued; gerund or present participle: tabuing

1.
place under prohibition.
“”traditional societies taboo female handling of food during this period””

willaful
willaful
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Reply to  Dabney Grinnan
03/27/2015 2:53 am

I’m reading a book now in which the hero is yearning for his ex-wife, the heroine, and it appears that she’s married someone else. And that stuck me as pretty taboo! So I see your point.

Bona
Bona
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03/21/2015 11:24 am

I’m not sure I share your POV of what a taboo is. I think we’re talking more about personal preferences than about real taboos (=things that cannot be mentioned in a romance novel).

Personally I can’t stand certain things (violence, racism, xenophobia, paranormal things in a normal setting, shotgun weddings), but those are not taboos, just personal likes/dislikes.

I understand a taboo is something different. It’s a ‘thing’ that you will never -or very rarely- find in a romance. Things that ‘cannot’ be mentioned. Something the main characters will never do or say. Because if you do that, you could risk and destroy the fantasy you want to live in while reading these books.

Is there anything like that in the romance genre? Yes I think so. They go from silly things like the hero being nearly always taller than the heroine, and he does not have bad personal odour or obesity problems. The heroine can be plum, but not the hero.

But there are serious issues that cannot be tackled. For instance, noblemen are nearly always nice and charming, the British Empire or any kind of Western Imperialism is accepted with no remorse. These novels do not usually hint, in any way, that these dukes and officers could have acted not very gentlemanly in India or in Africa or in Jamaica or during the Peninsula War.

I think that’s the biggest real taboo in the genre -these novels rarely cast any doubt on the economics or the politics of the setting. And it’s funny because on the other hand writers try not to show which political party the characters vote, or any strong religious feelings (outside the inspirational genre). But at the same time atheists are rarely mentioned. Everything is tepid on the ideological part.

The motto is -don’t show any conviction strong enough to alienate any part of the potential public. I think that could be considered as a ‘taboo’ in your average romance.

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
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Reply to  Bona
03/21/2015 4:08 pm

Yes, I had replied to Willaful that we were all mostly posting aversions and preferences, but taboos are a bit different. I would put interracial relationships in this category, though I think romances are getting a little better at trying to break with this taboo (carefully). Black and white romances though? Romances are still pretty conservative genre forms.

Yuri
Yuri
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Reply to  Blackjack1
03/22/2015 12:06 am

I agree we’re talking I think about hot button issues rather than taboos and the inclusion of politics and ideology are very rare to see in a romance … Which makes sense from a risk averse marketing perspective but does miss out a central aspect of characters. Similarly older protagonists, plain or plump heroes, or even heroes who are less successful than their heroines are rare.

Taboos would be making a hero out of a repentant rapist or a spousal abuser, which has been done but create outrage. I think the age one is still a true taboo … A lot of people are very uncomfortable with it. Abortion as already mentioned is another one.

cead
cead
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Reply to  Yuri
03/22/2015 10:10 am

Smaller, skinnier heroes too… there are more of those than there are plump heroes, probably, but that’s the type of guy I go for in real life, so I always notice the absence. Really the body types available to heroes is incredibly narrow; they can have a range of colouring, but they all have to be pretty much the same size and shape.

There are still a lot of taboos around women’s sexuality and sexual histories, too. Even heroines who are initially presented as having a lot of experience always turn out to not have so much as it seemed at first and to not have really enjoyed it all that much, and women initially presented as sexually dominant all suddenly turn out to be submissive after all. But you kind of see something similar with heroes too, in a subtler way, in that they typically discover that they were never truly sexually satisfied until they met the heroine. And it’s also very rare for either of them to have previous truly been in love or had previous relationships that weren’t utterly terrible or shallow. There’s something about having characters who have enjoyed satisfying romantic and/or sexual relationships ever in their lives before meeting the other person that romances tend to shy away from.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
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Reply to  Bona
03/22/2015 10:58 am

There are books that show the horrors of Imperialism. Meredith Duran has written several.

Yuri
Yuri
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03/21/2015 8:49 am

Ash:
Mine aren’t so much Taboos as personal deal breakers:

5: a random, superfluous supernatural element introduced into an otherwise normal story line, I have nothing against supernatural elements, I enjoy a good paranormal now and again but they need to be properly set up, interwoven into the story from the beginning, just throwing it in there to suddenly solve a problem or add additional drama is just shoddy writing.

Oh yes can’t stand this one either. I like paranormals but when it’s just introduced to solve a problem or is small element in an otherwise mundane book it just jars … Sometimes to the point I stop reading the author.

LeeF
LeeF
Guest
03/20/2015 11:49 pm

I begin to think I have no filters because I have enjoyed books in every single taboo/turn off mentioned- and hated some as well. Guess much of it depends on the writing and/or my time/place/mindset at the time. I’ll think about this over the weekend and decide if I am just lazy or am really willing to give most books a try at least once.

erika
erika
Guest
03/20/2015 7:01 pm

My taboo- promiscuous heroines and heroines who commit adultery. Interesting tho I just read a romance where the heroine does commit adultery. I decided to see if that’s still a taboo subject and discovered it was. The heroine was a complex character and the author made me root for her to the point that I wanted the heroine to leave her psycho husband and stay with the real hero- the other man!

chris booklover
chris booklover
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Reply to  erika
03/20/2015 8:33 pm

Erika:

What’s the name of the book?

erika
erika
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Reply to  chris booklover
03/21/2015 12:50 am

chris booklover:
Erika:

What’s the name of the book?

Underestimated by Jettie Woodruff.

The ending will leave you annoyed!!!!! You have been warned!

Tracey
Tracey
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Reply to  erika
03/24/2015 9:46 pm

No, I can’t stand adultery or when a wife gets with the other guy while she is married. One book I read has a plot of the wife having an affair with the other guy because her husband is not able to give her a child. I don’t need to read real life challenges and angst when I want romance.

willaful
willaful
Guest
03/20/2015 6:17 pm

I think this would be most interesting if it focused on actual cultural taboos, rather than preferences. Many people really enjoy playing around with taboos — faux incest seems to be big in romance right now, for example. It’s one I hate — except when I don’t. So that could be a very interesting topic.

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
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Reply to  willaful
03/20/2015 6:47 pm

There’s quite a lot of cross over between aversions, preferences, and actual taboos, of which there is quite a bit of conflict given the vast cultural influences that produce western cultures. Western culture highly privileges privacy, especially the “”man’s home is his castle,”” giving rise to the gun culture in the U.S. and high value we place on private property. A person’s home in western culture is almost holy and should not be invaded. Private information, such as our age or our weight has long been highly privileged to the point of near-taboo but with the tremendous spread of social media, privacy is becoming less valued or easily retained. Interracial relationships come close to taboo still and certainly in the past. Romances seem to be willing to explore this issue more now.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
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Reply to  willaful
03/21/2015 10:05 am

Do you mean the bookclub? Or this column? ;)

Sandlynn
Sandlynn
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03/20/2015 4:46 pm

One of my biggest turn-offs in any of my entertainment — be it books, movies, tv shows, plays is the torture, abuse and/or murder of a child or animal. The few times I’ve run across this in my romance reading, I’ve either soldiered through, even though I constantly thought about it and would never re-read the book. (An example would be Tracy Grant’s Daughter of the Game.) Or, I put the book down and had a hard time picking it back up. (An example would be Nora Roberts’ Montana Sky.)

I just don’t like to see innocent, defenseless beings harmed or tormented. I’m not a big fan of it happening to adult characters either! However, in many cases, they have the capacity to fight back and/or the intelligence to plot an escape. So, at least there’s a little more equivalency to the relationship.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
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Reply to  Sandlynn
03/20/2015 5:56 pm

That’s a no go for me too. I can’t watch torture of any kind of TV and I find it unreadable in books. But, I can flip through it occasionally UNLESS it is a child. Then it’s a “”Nope. I’m done.”” book for me.

TerryS
TerryS
Guest
03/20/2015 4:10 pm

Wow, I’m surprised at the number of people who singled out your no. 2 as one of their own taboos. I remember reading Catherine Anderson’s, Annie’s Song, and feeling silly because it gave me a “perv vibe” when so many others loved that book.

Other taboos:

1. Gratuitous rape scene- I don’t like when an author uses rape as a plot point. The best example is Judith McNaught’s, Whitney, My Love. I enjoyed the book up to that point. I never bought the hero’s motivation, and it felt like the author was just throwing in the rape scene in to add another conflict between the Hero and the Heroine. That was just so wrong.

2. Blood and/or gore – Due to a childhood trauma involving blood, this is an emotional taboo for me. I give wide berth to anything that might remotely contain blood and/or gore. A hero who gulps down blood, i.e. vampires, does not work for me. However, several people encouraged me to read Written in Red. (The heroine cuts her own skin and there are vampires – oh, the horror!) I enjoyed the book very much, and I didn’t feel traumatized in the least.

3. Unexpected Death of a Main Character – Do I need to tell you how devastated 10 year old me was when I read that Beth died in Little Women?

4. Extensive use of flash backs – I’m a linear thinker and flashbacks totally screw with my own space time continuum. Yet, one of my top 100 books, Private Arrangements, managed to get me to overlook this taboo. So, go ahead writers, make heavy use of flashbacks, but you better have Sherry Thomas’s ability to write exceptional prose.

5. Love Triangles – Unless you end up with a happy ménage à trois, some poor schmuck (or schmuckess?) is going to be heartbroken, effectively “harshing” my HEA mellow.

Yuri
Yuri
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Reply to  TerryS
03/22/2015 12:08 am

Agree on the love triangle … I always want them to end up in a ménage. Even when they make the ‘loser’ the hero of the next book they often do so by undercutting the first love which annoys me no end.

cead
cead
Guest
Reply to  Yuri
03/22/2015 10:16 am

I don’t think you necessarily need a ménage ending per se — any sort of poly timeshare arrangement works for me too. But yeah, I basically agree when the triangle is a convincing one. (It seems like a lot of the time it’s pretty clear pretty early on that the apex of the triangle actually does have an actual preference for one of the suitors over the other.)

Erin Burns
Erin Burns
Guest
03/20/2015 3:36 pm

Mine is infidelity. I can’t forgive or forget and it irks the hell out of me when the heroine does it. And now that Kari mentions it, the stallion thing is probably going to bother me from now on too. Kari, there’s probably a whole slew of books on my re-read shelf that you’ve now demolished for me ;)

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
Guest
Reply to  Erin Burns
03/20/2015 3:50 pm

For me infidelity isn’t a deal breaker. There are contexts in which I think it is just an obstacle a couple can overcome.

I know I am the outlier here in Romancelandia about this, however.

Yuri
Yuri
Guest
Reply to  Dabney Grinnan
03/22/2015 12:11 am

Infidelity isn’t a deal breaker for me either as long as the characters actually deal with it. But I still think it’s a taboo with in romance … witness all the plot contortions authors create to make sure protagonists aren’t technically unfaithful.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
Guest
Reply to  Yuri
03/22/2015 10:55 am

It’s interesting to me that gritty is so in but it rarely deals with the things that make real love so gritty: unwanted pregnancy, infidelity, fights over money, etc…

willaful
willaful
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Reply to  Dabney Grinnan
03/22/2015 12:14 pm

Interesting point. A lot of it is kind of “”safe”” gritty, in a way.

Erin Burns
Erin Burns
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Reply to  Dabney Grinnan
03/24/2015 12:42 am

I find that my issue is I don’t have enough time with the characters, nor do I feel they have enough with each other, for it not to fall flat. It takes me out of the story. An hour of my time and about a week of theirs, simply isn’t enough time for me.

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
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Reply to  Yuri
03/22/2015 6:14 pm

I find this to be especially true around issues of parenthood. If authors want to represent couples happy sans children, that plot is usually accompanied with lots of reasons or excuses. I personally would like to read a romance that features abortion because the pregnancy is unwanted, or even better, the overt use of birth control by couples that do not want children, because the equation of children with happiness in romantic relationships is problematic and far overdone. I’m ready to see alternative family arrangements in romance writing.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
Guest
Reply to  Blackjack1
03/23/2015 4:04 pm

I so agree. And I’m a mom of four. Maybe it’s because I’m a mom of four and, while I love my children, have had first hand experience about how much work and tears go into having and raising kids, it makes me crazy to see it treated as an inherently rosy future for couples.

Kari Lynn Dell
Kari Lynn Dell
Guest
03/20/2015 1:34 pm

Stallions. The equine version, not human. Huge cliche. Drives me nuts when I’m reading a western (historical or contemporary) and the hero or heroine rides a stallion for no purpose other than to show how studly they are (pun intended). As soon as I see that in a book I know this is an author who doesn’t really know horses or ranching, because nobody keeps a stallion around unless they’re in the serious business of raising horses. Not because stallions are so fiery and hard to handle. They’re no different than any other horse if they’re raised and broke right. In fact, ours were both kind of lazy. They’re just a pain in butt to have around, making sure there’s always at least two solid fences between their pastures and the mares.

Want to show me what a great horseman/woman your character is? Put them on a hellbitch of an alpha mare. That’ll test ’em.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
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Reply to  Kari Lynn Dell
03/20/2015 2:35 pm

That made me think… and giggle.

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
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Reply to  Kari Lynn Dell
03/20/2015 5:00 pm

Awesome, response, Kari!! I have two gentle geldings and have always been amused by the stallion insertion into a romance as a metaphor or male virility and power. Stallions are a pain in the butt, but here in Oregon where I live, we have a doofus neighbors with a stallion that they keep around to show off – not a breeding farm and sadly, they seem pretty clueless about the limitations their choices put on their animal. As a horse person I’m always especially attentive to how authors use horses in their writing. I wish there was a special title listing for this!

You are absolutely right though that anyone that knows horses would put their tough guys on a lead mare!

Ash
Ash
Guest
03/20/2015 12:00 pm

Completely agree with you about the whole “”girl flowering into womanhood thing””. because of this I generally avoid Guardian/Ward romances unless I know for a fact that the guardian in question either wasn’t around to watch the girl “”flower”” or there is a very small age gap between the two. Major age differences need to be handled carefully for me too. I could not read Julie Anne Long’s “”The Runaway Duke”” because I could not shake off the icky feeling.

Mine aren’t so much Taboos as personal deal breakers:

1: The hero at any point abuses the heroine sexually or physically, “”forced seduction”” (a.k.a Rape) is nothing short of awful and heinous even if the heroine magically begins to enjoy it (I’m looking at you Clayton Westmoreland)

2: Infidelity.

3: sexism towards heroines in contemporary romances; I tend to give a bit of leeway to my historical heroes but I cannot stand a sexist contemporary hero.

4; Insta love, although some authors have managed to make it work so I guess it’s not a complete deal breaker.

5: a random, superfluous supernatural element introduced into an otherwise normal story line, I have nothing against supernatural elements, I enjoy a good paranormal now and again but they need to be properly set up, interwoven into the story from the beginning, just throwing it in there to suddenly solve a problem or add additional drama is just shoddy writing.

Amanda
Amanda
Guest
03/20/2015 11:33 am

Your second Taboo is one of mine as well, along with:
sibling falling for sibling ex
sudden or surprise menage

Lynda X
Lynda X
Guest
03/20/2015 10:51 am

Oh, you are SO right in your objections to “”where the guy watched the girl flower into womanhood.”” Creepy. Disgusting. NOT romantic. At all. You’re right absolutely right, Kristie J about women who don’t want their babies’ fathers to know about the baby. Selfish. Stupid. NOT romantic.

My personal taboos are explicit cruelty or even torture in a book, especially to animals or children. I don’t care if it is part of history. It haunts me, and I read romances for fun.

I loathe a “”hero”” (and they usually are the heroes) who mistreats the heroine for sometimes hundreds of pages, then he realizes he was wrong (she WAS a virgin, his best friend lied to him, she isn’t a French spy or like his mother), apologizes and is forgiven. Such pictures of a sadistic hero, linked with a masochistic heroine, are NOT romance.

Another NOT romance is the stupid misunderstanding which logically would be cleared up with a simple question which never gets asked. “”Did you sleep with my best friend?”” “”Did you steal the necklace?”” “”Are you a spy?”” “”Are you pregnant?”” could all be answered by one word. NOT romance.

Stupid characters are NOT romance. The heroine who clings to her immaturity for hundreds of pages–“”I refuse to be quiet. Nobody tells me what to do. I don’t care that the Indians are looking for us.”” The heroine who stamps her feet and won’t marry the hero in the 19th century because he hasn’t told her he loves her, although even the prince regent knows it. The hero who won’t trust any woman because his mother abandoned him to run off with her lover. The hero who continues to believe the worst about the heroine who gives her blood for him or his child and suffers her family’s and social abandonment.

There are lots of taboos in romance. As a matter of fact, there should be more.

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
Guest
Reply to  Lynda X
03/20/2015 4:54 pm

Good list, Lynda! I have to second your assertion about the hero/mother paradigm. It falls into psychobabble at times for me, and honestly, adults need to come to terms earlier in their adulthood with parent issues and not transfer them onto possible mates. Also, there are just too many “”bad mothers”” out there in the world of fiction for my taste.

Maria
Maria
Guest
03/20/2015 10:28 am

The whole abortion thing…….no, nada nope. Graphic violence shown toward women and children instead of told, just can’t deal. In addition, violence that is silly, cartoonish and exploitative is a big no no for me. Don’t read Kresley Cole for that reason anymore.
BDSM is just no way, no how for me.
Another taboo, (or what I consider lazy writing) hypocritical religious people, I am sooooo over this stereotype.

Straight romances with gay character in them. The gay characters often serve no purpose other than to show the reader how wonderful and open minded the hero/heroine is, or even worse, show the reader how open minded the author is. Blatant use of stereotypes like the gay man who has nothing better to do with his life than act as a sounding board for the heroine while doing her hair. Insta conflict with the evil religious family members…..I could go on. Tired of being beat over the head with this.

But if there is a taboo club….why would anyone read the book if it’s taboo for them? The people who do read it wouldn’t consider such material taboo. So the name wouldn’t make much sense.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
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Reply to  Maria
03/20/2015 10:50 am

I was thinking of Taboos that might be worth breaking.

Maria
Maria
Guest
Reply to  Dabney Grinnan
03/20/2015 11:17 am

Such as?

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
Guest
Reply to  Maria
03/20/2015 2:34 pm

Well, I’d like to read a well-written book with an abortion in it and see if it worked. I’d like to read a book where there’s an insta-pregnancy (acutally Joan Kilby has one I love) that works. I like to be shown I’m wrong!

erika
erika
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Reply to  Maria
03/20/2015 7:17 pm

Maria said, “”Straight romances with gay character in them. The gay characters often serve no purpose other than to show the reader how wonderful and open minded the hero/heroine is, or even worse, show the reader how open minded the author is. Blatant use of stereotypes like the gay man who has nothing better to do with his life than act as a sounding board for the heroine while doing her hair. Insta conflict with the evil religious family members…..I could go on. Tired of being beat over the head with this.””

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This!
I read a harlequin once that was sooo preachy with this that it totally turned me off the entire book. I’ve read some gay romances that get preachy too…would love it if they made the “”villains”” more complex instead of cartoonishly eevvvilll cause they don’t agree with who a person sleeps with.

maggie b.
maggie b.
Guest
03/20/2015 10:22 am

Mine is more a preference too but I hate, hate, hate it when the hero/heroine have their first love scene and the hero immediately after picks a fight with the heroine. This happens in Julia Quinn’s An Offer from a Gentleman, Meagan McKinney’s Moonlight Becomes Her, and an awful Dorothy Garlock book that took place in the 50s. The unfortunate thing is there is no way to know if this is coming; no blurb would include this information. But its the one thing guaranteed to ruin a book for me.

Kristie(J)
Kristie(J)
Guest
03/20/2015 10:15 am

My biggest one is a heroine who doesn’t want her baby daddy to be part of the child’s life. Unless the father is a threat or dangerous to mother or child, I will loath the heroine and thus the book. It’s such a selfish thing to do and it’s robbing your child of a valuable part of their lives.
To go along with that, the mother who refuses to take child support based on the same kind of reasoning. That makes me equally angry.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
Guest
Reply to  Kristie(J)
03/20/2015 10:18 am

I am so with you there. The “”my baby and I don’t need nothing from you”” line is so selfish. Ugh.

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
Guest
03/20/2015 8:38 am

First, I’m in agreement that hard and fast rules don’t always apply because good writing on just about all topics can persuade me.

Having said that, as a rule I don’t put the following in the negative column:

Absence of Birth Control (unless it factors into the plot) – hard to believe that in our modern age there are romances where couples are getting it on without thinking about birth control, but there are. It pulls me out of the story because my mind immediately starts thinking about consequences and then wondering why characters are so careless and what that might indicate to us about them. And then I start speculating if the plot is transitioning rapidly to a wedding. I know sometimes the appearance of a condom is awkward and perhaps less than romantic, but so is an unplanned pregnancy (much less STDs)!

Kidnappings, especially of heroines – I am sensitive to power dynamics in a romance novel and am downright squeamish about abduction scenarios that strip control away from women and victimize them. (Far too many romances in this vein.) Despite this taboo for me, I did love Joanna Bourne’s _The Spymaster’s Lady_. Nevertheless, the abduction scenes still give me pause, despite the utterly besotted hero in it. Authors have to work extra hard to make this plot work for me.

Employer/employee romances (governesses, housemaids, hired help, tutors) – Generally, as a rule, romances that do not consider the power dynamics and instead idealize this relationship or just brush aside the problems associated with it are troubling for me. (Mind you, I’m looking forward to Julie Anne Long’s new romance despite what I’ve read about this scenario featuring heavily.)

**Inarticulate, brawny alpha males – As much as I’m drawn to eloquent and articulate men, laconic, beefy alpha men that grunt their way through a romance just as equally turn me off. Kristen Ashley reigns here, and I just cannot read these stories without cringing or wanting to sit the man down and hand him a dictionary. (I also hate covers that picture these hyper-muscular men as sexy – not for me.) I have a real aversion here and so this type of character may be especially difficult to pull off.

Caz
Caz
Guest
Reply to  Blackjack1
03/20/2015 12:44 pm

I just finished the Long, Blackjack, and it’s very good. I didn’t have any issues with the power -dynamic, although I’d be the first to admit that isn’t at the top of my taboo list

Blackjack1
Blackjack1
Guest
Reply to  Caz
03/20/2015 4:45 pm

Thanks, Caz! Long is a favorite author and I felt that she would handle power dynamics well. Looking forward to reading it soon and reading reviews!

Jill Q.
Jill Q.
Guest
03/20/2015 8:14 am

I’m with you on taboo number two. I can read romances where characters have a big range in age, but it has to be handled carefully. If I start mentally hearing “”Girl, you’ll be a woman soon”” in my head, I’m out of there. I hate to put hard and fast rules down because there will always be an exception.

Not a big fan of women or children being hurt/stalked in a manipulative “”push the reader’s fear buttons”” way by the author. So, I don’t read a lot of modern romantic suspense or anything with serial killers. It almost always feels salicious and in poor taste to me.

Dabney Grinnan
Dabney Grinnan
Guest
Reply to  Jill Q.
03/20/2015 10:19 am

Thanks! Now I’ll have this in my head all day. Did I mention I hate Neil Diamond? :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGvMjgLXBi0