Her One and Only

TEST

Well, there was six hours of my life I’m not getting back. I didn’t want to be harsh, but I feel it’s a must. I have utter respect for any writer who is able to get published, but after reading Her One and Only, I nearly called the local “Save The Trees” chapter to report it as a crime against the environment. This was a train wreck. This was…

Continuous feed of an Anna Nicole Smith acceptance speech.

This book is the second in a series revolving around Prospect, British Columbia, during the frontier era. The hero and heroine from the previous book (The Man for Her) are mere acquaintances to the main couple here, although I wasn’t aware of that initially and considered whether or not my book was defective and missing the first few chapters. I’m not exaggerating. I looked.

Emma Douglas ran away to the frontier to be a sour-faced schoolmarm to the children of Prospect. She hates her job. She whines constantly about it. She must sweep the floors, erase the chalkboard, fetch wood and water, and teach children. Then she goes home to her boardinghouse where there is a maid and a landlady who cooks all her meals. Wow! Poor baby.

Emma left her old life of luxury after her father, a bank president in San Francisco, supposedly committed suicide after being accused of embezzlement. She paid down his debt and fled. But did daddy really embezzle money? Did he really commit suicide? Well, of course not. This is a romance novel, so now we set out to figure who the murderer is. That is easily guessed and horribly played out.

Oh, this is a romance, right? Guess there must be a hero. Barely. Grey North owns a swanky hotel. We never find out how he meets Emma…or even when. They just happen to know each other from page one. Grey is exactly what his name hints at. The author tells us he is charming, carefree, witty, and with an easy smile – but she never shows us. We know barely anything about him, except, of course, that he is a titled Englishman disinherited after an argument with his father over a woman.

In order to avoid unwanted suitors, Grey proposes a fake courtship with Emma so they both can go on with their lives (because of his own parent’s marriage, he never planned to marry…I think). Emma and Grey’s scandals are made public shortly thereafter. Eventually he accompanies her on her voyage back to San Fransisco to clear her father’s name. There’s an avalanche, an argument, a demand to marry for honor. It’s all very so, so.

If you haven’t already got the gist of how bad this book is, I will do what I must: Bullet points.

  • Flat characters. I have no idea who these people are. The actions do not coincide with what we are told of there character.
  • Three kisses, one love scene while the hero was in a feverish state of delirium.
    ‘Nuff said.
  • An utterly boring and predictable plot. This cover should have a warning “Do not read while operating heavy machinery. Alcohol might intensify the effect.” I made the mistake of having a glass of wine while reading this. I passed out mid-sentence. Speaking of covers…
  • Never Judge A Book By its Cover. This is the exception to the rule. To quote from a recent ATBF column, “the cover looked like a cover for a gay cowboy porn novel” I couldn’t have put it any better than that.

I tried my best to look for something good to say about this novel. I knew by page fifty that it was a stinker, but I kept an open mind and hoped that the story would pull me in just a little bit. I couldn’t have cared less for the characters and would have gladly put the book down twenty pages to the end. If you are in the mood for a frontier-esque novel, pick any Maggie Osborne. Even Linda Lael Miller at her worst reads like a dream in comparison. Run! Run as fast as you can from this book!

Reviewed by Lisa Gardineer

Grade: F

Sensuality: Warm

Review Date: 18/07/06

Publication Date: 2006

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Recent Comments …

  1. excellent book: interesting, funny dialogs, deep understanding of each character, interesting secondary characters, and also sexy.

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