Fifty Shades the Movie: Blythe’s Take
Okay, everyone and their dog has weighed in on this one, whether it’s because they saw it, didn’t see it and didn’t think anyone should see it either, or are waiting until it comes out on DVD so they can save their hard earned money. I for one, was looking forward to this for weeks. Maybe months. I knew precisely how I wanted to see it: In a theater full of women, with my girlfriends. A theater where you could drink. That’s precisely what I did, and it was awesome.
Most of us have have HDTV and we’re all busy with work, school, kids, and life. I genuinely like going to the movies for its own sake and always have. However, I go much less frequently than I used to. But with something like Fifty Shades, there are compelling reasons to experience a movie socially. There are ways it can add to your experience and make it unforgettable. I will never forget watching Crimson Tide in a dollar theater in New Orleans with everyone shouting at the screen. Or seeing Disturbia on an opening Friday in a theater full of teenagers. It all becomes part of the experience. For me this meant hooking up with Mel, Jackie, and two peartinis, merlots, and chardonnays respectively (peartinis for me). We actually had horrid seats right in the front behind a group of women who had clearly pre-gamed; they were way drunker than we were. I can assure you that this only added to the experience, which is what we told them afterwards when they apologized.
In my opinion, this movie should be interspersed with frequent giggling and probably some catcalling. Random people shouting “Yikes!” and “What?!?” are also helpful. For some reason I can’t really explain, Mel and I giggled uncontrollably every time they shot the front of Christian’s building, which said “Grey House”. We just found it funny. I get that some people take this seriously, and I don’t have a problem with that. For me it works best as farce, and I very much enjoyed it on that level. All three of us had read the book; Mel and Jackie read all three, and I made it through two. So we knew what we were getting into.
As for the nuances of the movie itself, I can talk with some authority on that, too. First off, I was surprisingly impressed with the cinematography. It’s well shot, and it’s pretty to look at. My personal feeling is that it elevated the original material (which I suppose is my way of saying it was better than the book, which I personally find to be terribly written). Visually, you get a compelling picture of what seduction and desire look like. Close up shots of lips, eyes. Things you focus on and notice. That worked well. The movie also neatly side-stepped my person pet peeve about the book – Ana’s lack of email address. In the movie her computer in on the fritz, so she doesn’t have to act all wide-eyed like she’s never seen one before. And not only was the “Laters, Baby” was kept to a minimum, we also didn’t have to hear Ana’s irritating inner monologue about her inner goddess with the “Holy Crap” this and the “Holy Shit” that. I also liked that Ana looked about like you’d picture her – like a somewhat uncertain college student who hadn’t fine-tuned her fashion sense. She looks twenty-two, and she has a great body that doesn’t seem to glorify an impossibly thin ideal.
Christian is pretty easy on the eyes himself, and I could buy him much of the time. But every time he said the really hardcore stuff? Giggles. Uncontrollable giggles. “I don’t make make love. I fuck…hard.” Yeah, right. I am pretty sure it’s the former. I don’t know how he said it without laughing himself.
At the end of the day, if you’re a fan of the book I think you should see it. If you want a fun social experience, go see it, and bring your friends (other women. This is a girl thing. Thanks, Mel and Jackie). I think peartinis and chardonnay also enhance the experience, but your mileage may vary. If you have seen it, what did you think? And what were you hoping for? If you haven’t seen it, can you think of other movies you watched in a complimentary social setting? I’d love to hear about that too.
Laters, Baby.
Went with a friend; as far as a titillating experience, it might be better as a DVD watch while alone without sniggering going on around oneself pulling one out of the mood. Did not read the books. I found the end very abrupt and unsatisfying, my friend had to explain that’s how the first book ends; without knowing that, I’d have been pretty upset. Spoiler alerts following! What I liked: <Agree that they did a good job picking a female lead who had a nice body still with a bit of a low belly pooch and not huge boobs–ie not your typical porn blow-up doll <Knowing this was originally the author's erotic fanfic of twilight characters (and I HATE twilight–which is why I won't read the books), I was impressed that Dakota was able to give the female lead's character a sense of sureness of what she would and wouldn't tolerate and clearly drew a line at abuse vs impact play–a real person and not a lump of clay, even though she was a virgin. Loved her flirting back with sexual innuendo at the end of the "business meeting"–a woman who knew she had the man by the short and curlies and how to control her sexuality. <Laughed my ass off at the "this is my playroom" "what, like your xbox and stuff?" <First meeting was actually quite charming and well done, much better than I anticipated from the trailer–this was the one of 3 spots in the movie where I felt the whole enigmatic passionate tightly wound alpha male actually came through. The other being when he really belts her and you really see the relief overcome his face–kudos to the actor for showing such vulnerability! And the other when he says "I want to fuck you into next week"–this didn't feel terribly authentic from the actor, but I liked the pen twirling in contrast to his usual stillness and the impatience and intensity he tries to convey when he says this. What I didn't like: It came off as softporn geared toward MEN–aagh: <So much beautiful female flesh on display, so little payoff for a female viewer who would want to see that alpha wall crumble. Okay, we see his much-vaunted "golden torso" but those eyes are way too soft and he doesn't deliver enough of the over-calm still lion performance for those moments when he "loses control" to have much of an erotic or emotional impact. <I would've like a visual feast of his skin contrasted against something sensual the way the actress' body was sensually highlighted in the movie against the red. <Weird brief view of the top of his groin hair that has a lot more gray than one would expect for a 28 yo (or however old the hero is supposed to be), editing was jarring so one just KNEW that the camera didn't dare pan down any further because of the actor's contract. <You never get a good look at his face when they're having sex, and hear one grunt. I wanted to see that sense of him getting lost in the sensuality, as the whole movie implies is driving his change in behavior to the point of obsession. <When he finds out she's a virgin and he says "where have you been" wonderingly–is this a BDSM kink thing?? This is a manslut that in <12 years has gone through 14 or so contracts, doesn't realize he was sexually abused when he was 16 yo; why would he value a virgin so much? not explained; possibly just the male Galatea fantasy of (again) a lump of clay to mold into the perfect woman and oh, popping her cherry. <Lot of screen time on BDSM props–possibly pandering to the BDSM crowd? For the mainstream audience that don't have a Pavlovian response of arousal to these objects, probably would've been time better spent showing bodies/emotions. <Continuity errors bugged the crap out of me: what happened to her necklace during all those sex scenes?? It's large, framed by clothing, and made to be so notable when she's dressed to show her "unicorn" side that it's annoying that it goes missing when she's naked. He's whapping her with the belt, emotionally released but not that sweaty, then he goes to pouring sweat the next frame?? <The very promising hand going into the panties so OBVIOUSLY didn't end up with the hands more than 25% into the panties–again, so poorly edited that you KNOW in real life it… Read more »
My 18 year old son and girlfriend went to see it last night. Their verdict: good soundtrack used well, attractive actors, terrible dialogue, and annoying ending. They gave it a C-/D+.
Generally, I’m in complete agreement about the annoyance of people treating a movie theater as an extension of their own living rooms. I find I go to the movies a lot less than I’d like because I simply get too frustrated by the talkers and texters and people who kick the back of my seat. It’s just not worth the rise in my blood pressure. But there are some movies that are event movies for me that I just have to see on a big screen. Usually we try to go on a Sunday evening when the theater is likely to be the least crowded. If not, I just mentally prepare myself that it’s going to be kind of crazy and just try to roll with it.
Great review, Blythe. I totally agree about some movies being better as a social event. For me, every movie that I ever waited in line for a midnight showing was all about the experience more than the actual show. “”Pirates of the Caribbean””, “”Harry Potter”” movies, “”Lord of the Rings: Return of The King””, I could go on.
My daughter and I were stuck in Greenville SC over the past two days (long story involving an inch of ice and snow and airports that don’t have de-icing equipment) and went to the movies to kill time. She’s wanted to see 50SoG but she’s only 16 while her friends are all 17, so she’s afraid she won’t be allowed to get into the theater. Anyway, we were at the cinema and deciding on which movie to see, and she mentioned 50SoG. I asked her if that was really a movie she wanted to see with her mom because I had no desire to see it with my teenager! She agreed and we picked another movie. I’ll probably wait until it comes out on DVD and watch it with my husband so we can laugh together.
Yeah- you have hit on all the reasons I pretty much don’t go to the move theater anymore. People are so used to watching everything in their own home that watching a movie in public is similar to going to a sporting event or the circus. No one can manage to sit through an entire movie without getting up to go to the bathroom, talking or texting on the phone, chatting with friends and the previously mentioned unending giggling and talking to the screen. When I pay that much to see a film on the big screen I really don’t enjoy “”turning movies into a social gathering””.
My uncontrolable snicker snorting moment -> “”I want to fuck you into the middle of next week””. Dornan looked like he’d eaten something bad for dinner when he said that one. Another winner was “”are you going to make love to me now?””. There was this group of women in the back row that couldn’t stop giggling through the whole thing.
I love turning movies into a social gathering. There’s an old vaudeville theater in my city that still plays movies on 35mm. They play cult classics and audience participation is encouraged. Last Halloween I watched “”Beetlejuice”” there with friends. It was a blast. The audience laughed, yelled, hooted, hollered, and quoted along with the film.
My girlfriends and I will also go see new releases as a group when they have special meaning. Such as when the remake of “”Footloose”” came out. The original made such impact on us growing up, that as soon as the remake was announced we made plans to go see it together. Nearly the entire audience was groups of girlfirends between the ages of 30 and 45 who all had the same idea. Loads of fun!
Good to hear from you, Blythe, and that you had such a good time with your friends. I got caught by the wine part, I must confess, and thought that for me that movie in particular would likely be a serious waste of good alcohol. ;)
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good to hear an opinion from someone who saw the movie, read the book. I’ve already ordered the DVD. When this wintery weather ends I plan on seeing the movie.
When I saw the last 3 Twilight movies in the theater I had the same experience- a theater full of women and some teens giggling and hooting everytime Jake took his shirt off.
My friends and I went to see _Showgirls_ years back when we were in college thinking that it would be both hilarious and maybe titillating. Alas, it was only the former. We definitely had our laughs, but in the end I wanted to go home and take a shower. I just don’t think I can do it again and, in fact, after reading appalling reviews of 50 Shades, I ended up taking it off my Netflix queue a couple of days ago.
I have not seen the movie, but my twenty something daughter did with a group of her girlfriends. She said the ‘I don’t make love…’ line got a huge laugh from the audience. I was amazed Jennifer Ehle (Elizabeth Bennet) has a part in the film. She doesn’t make many films and she shows up in this one! Please somebody give the woman a good part in a better movie.
All this talk of dressing up for RHPS has me wanting to wear a ball gag to see 50. Think we can start a trend? :) I do plan to see it with my girlfriends and we will likely be intoxicated. (Actually, the ball gag might be a good idea after all…) We saw Magic Mike in a group and it was a hoot. Terrible movie, but we didn’t care. A trip to see the upcoming sequel must happen as well.
I’m sure Dornan is a lovely person, but he really doesn’t do it for me as a romantic lead. He’s more like “”best friend’s goofy cousin who uses terrible pick up lines”” in my mind.
See, lines like “”I don’t make love. I fuck… hard.”” are what would make it impossible for me to see this film in a public setting because I’d be howling with laughter to such an extent that I’d probably bring on an asthma attack and eventually get thrown out of the cinema!
But kudos to Jamie Dornan for being able to say it without corpsing. I wonder how many takes it took…
I agree with you on the books being terribly written, and so I have to admit I didn’t have high hopes for the movie. Your trip to the movies sounds like great fun, though!
AS for social movie watching, pretty much anything in my college’s movie theater ended up being fun. Monty Python and the Holy Grail was in a class by itself, though. Some folks dressed up, many had “”pre-gamed”” (as you put it), and just about all of us could recite huge chunks of the movie along with the actors. Great fun!
Oh, those college movies! I remember bonding with friends over the campus midnight movies we attended together. Harold and Maude was one of our favorites. Such good times!
As for 50 Shades, I haven’t read it, not sure I’ll ever see the film as I rarely see anything until it makes it to the streaming market. I really have no opinion on it.
I have no desire to see FSOG (there really isn’t enough Chardonnay in the world to make me want to see that movie), but I loved those “”interactive”” movie nights particularly with Rocky Horror, the Airplane movies and Monty Python. The whole theatre breaking out in song to “”Every Sperm is Sacred”” from Python’s The Meaning of Life or throwing toast at the RHPS are some of the moments that bring back fond memories of a time when going to the movies was a lot of fun.
I have not read the books (although I did read a few pages and was not impressed) nor will I see the movie…but I had to chuckle at your comment about it being a movie for people to giggle and catcall to the screen. I doubt this will be the cult following of Rocky Horror Picture Show has…but one has to wonder that if there was that much giggling and catcalling if the movie should be interactive…